Thursday, 9 June 2011

Mac The Knife

To say I had a restless night would be an understatement. My imagination caused me to burst out crying at one point. I swung from not wanting the procedure to wishing they would hurry up so I don't have to feel so ill.
My room mates struck up a frogs chorus around midnight when they burped, snored and farted their way into sleep. And this is something I've never come across before, sleep singing. One lady, who is a bit lively when awake to say the least, kept bursting into song startling everyone awake, but at least the other sound effects stopped for a while. I swear to God it was like bedding down with Ethel Merman. To top it all I was sick early this morning. Might have been nerves, might have been last night's cauliflower mornay, we will never know.

Was woken up to have a light breakfast at seven this morning, I really didn't feel like eating but forced a hard boiled egg and a cup of tea down, the only things I could face. I've been told to drink as much as I can up until midday as this will make my veins and arteries easier to find. I've also been told to take my duretics. Excellent, who wants to bet that halfway through the procedure I'll need the loo? A shower followed as I've been told to stick to shallow baths for the next few days so I don't get my dressings wet while everything heals and so the waiting begins. They say I will be taken over around 12.30 and returned around 5pm.

Had a phone call around ten from Laurence's god father inviting me to the christening of his daughter. it is the weekend after next. I might be out by then if all goes to plan but not sure if I'll be up to partying. I will have to see but I really hope so.

Ok here is your warning, if you don't like medical stuff stop reading now.

Well I won't lie and say it was painless because it wasn't but it wasn't that bad either. Every hospital is different in it's procedures but this is how they did mine. I was taken into a room very much like the rooms you go to have right heart catheters or ablations, if you have never had one of those imagine a cross between an operating theatre and an x-ray room. I was allowed to keep my pyjama bottoms on but was give a gown to cover my top which was tied askew to expose my right shoulder down as far as my boob. I lay on a trolley and they inserted a canula in my arm and cleaned my neck, shoulder and upper chest, twice. they then draped me with green sterile sheets. I was given what the surgeon described as 'a stiff gin or three'. I've never had a stiff gin but it was very nice and I felt quite relaxed but was fully concious and able to hear everything that was going on around me. By far the worst thing was the shot of local into my neck. I protested at that, but after that I felt no other pain but a lot of pulling and tugging. The procedure lasted about twenty five minutes and I had three stitches, two in my neck where the line was fed into the jugular and down into the heart, and another just above my boob where the line comes out to be fitted to the pump. I have two large pressure dressings, one on my neck and one over the exit site. They are both very sore but nothing paracetamol cannot cope with.

By six o'clock I was up downing cups of tea and managed to have some soup but couldn't eat the full meal. They have given me some biscuits in case I feel hungry later on. Very relieved it is all over and despite the noisy bunch I'm bunked with I think I'm going to sleep well tonight. The worst is over, hello recovery, the sooner the better.