Monday, 24 December 2012


Well I've still got this damned cough! I'm beginning to wonder whether it will ever go away. Apart from that I'm feeling more like me now, I been out and found I managed quite well and I feel I am now ready to get back to normal, and that means work.

It is going to be strange, I always feel worried about going back after a long time off and feel even worse as it was the run up to Christmas. I know my colleagues will understand, they know I can't help it but it doesn't stop me feeling guilty, especially as the doctor refused to shorten the sick note. On the other hand I did say I was going to take more care of myself now I'm on the list so if the doctor thinks I need the time I'd just better go along with it and do as I'm told.

And so the question about leaving work has risen it's head again. My family and my medical team feel I spend far to much time worrying about work. Ideally they would like to wrap me up in cotton wool and keep me safe until the call comes. However what if the call never comes? What if it doesn't come until a year has passed, two years, what would I do with myself? On the other hand if the call came today it would be nice to be able to go back to work fully fit and finally able to pull my weight. In two weeks the new shift pattern kicks in and I've always said I'd give that a go before making any firm decisions and I'm going to try and stick by that. Although the new pattern gives me less time off between shifts I will be working shorter days. I have no idea if this is going to make me more or less tired until I try it. Decisions, decisions, I just do not know what to do at present.

I've got my prescription refilled yesterday so I am armed to the teeth with antibiotics and steroids in case things take another downward turn. I was worried that my constant infections would mean I might miss my chance if I was ill when suitable lungs came along. Apparently this isn't the case. When they explained why to me it made perfect sense. They would be cutting the infected lungs out and as I'd immediately be put on strong antibiotics any residual infection would be treated. What a ding bat not to think of that, however they will not do it if you are on steroids as they can prevent healing, so from now on steroids will be the very, very last resort.

In the news my heart goes out to those people who are currently battling floods. I watched the news last night in horror as picture after picture showed floods and land slips. And it is still raining. I cannot remember anything like it. Yes there have been floods before, I remember seeing some horrors in recent years but nothing like this. Previous floods have come and gone fairly quickly but this year they just keep coming and coming. As we were threatened with drought conditions earlier in the year the turn around is amazing and sort of proves the old saying 'be careful what you wish for'. I hope that things start to dry out soon and that the families effected can have a good Christmas despite everything nature has thrown at them.

And on that note I want to wish everyone who reads this blog a very Merry Christmas but above all a healthy one. Take care, eat, drink and be merry and look after yourselves and each other.